What's Up #9: Just a Chill Post

Hello everyone, and welcome back.
Today's post is going to be a very relaxed post as I'm currently not feeling well, but I still wanted to do a post.

Today's has been a day of quiet reflection for me. Typically, I try to set aside at least 5-10 minutes per day to reflect on my feelings and thoughts, in an attempt to keep track of potential mood triggers. My mental health has become a priority following months of being ill, which allowed my mental health to deteriorate.

Today as I was reflecting, one word constantly came into my mind. That word was gratitude. As a clinician, teaching and understanding the power of gratitude is an essential part of my practice with clients, however, within my own personal life, I allow it to be overshadowed by other events in life. As 2019 opened, I made it my goal to look for small moments every week that I was grateful for. From seeing beautiful butterflies fluttering in my garden, to hearing rain during our hot dry season here in Trinidad. Thus far, the results of this practice have been astonishing. I've noticed that I'm purposely looking for the good in everyday, rather than focusing on one event that may have been negative and dwelling on that negativity which would in turn greatly affect my mood. Rather, I would look for the lesson in that negative event, I take that lesson to heart and let the event go to rest.
While this is an ongoing process, and while my anxiety isn't miraculously cured, I've gotten a better hold on my anxiety, and I've experienced much fewer events of panic. I've been able to ground myself better because I've been practicing and learning to shift the focus from the event/catalysis to what I can learn or gain from this event.

Despite my profession, this isn't a help guide post. This post is legitimately just me pouring out what's in my brain at the moment. I'm grateful that I have this platform to allow me to speak freely about what I love and what I care about. I'm passionate about mental health and opening the door to discussions on mental health, just as much as I'm passionate about sharing my love for makeup. I'm grateful for each person who reads any of my blog posts; for you to willingly take time out of your day to come visit my blog means the world to me, and makes me very happy.
I'm planning on doing more posts like this one, where I pour my heart and brain out onto a keyboard. It's a personal touch, and as aforementioned I'm passionate about mental health, so it's important to me to speak openly about my own struggles.

Thank you all for coming by today. I'll see you all next time.
Bye guys (^_^)/

Learning to Cope with Grief

Hello everyone!

Today, I'm doing a very different post. Earlier this week, I lost someone very dear to me, and I have been going through the emotional roller coaster that is grief. I've spent so much of life being a rock for others, that I've neglected tuning into and feeling my own emotions. Not this time!
I've become very aware of my emotions, and have chosen not diminish their meaning. When someone asks me how I am, rather than simply stating I'm okay, I acknowledge that I'm feeling sad, or angry, and it actually makes me feel better knowing that I'm not hiding what I am truly feeling.

I know I've made this blog into my space for talking about makeup or video games, but I feel that there is a need for me to be real and raw sometimes, and to just put whatever is on my mind out into the world. I'm not the type of person who freely opens up in conversations (something I'm working on), however, I have this platform to just be free and talk/write about whatever I feel, and today, I feel like talking about the fact that I am sad, but I am trying to cope.

Coping with the death of a loved one is never easy, even if you think you've prepared yourself enough, the emotional toll is still quite severe. You learn that the 5 stages of grief aren't linear stages, they get all jumbled up, and sometimes it makes it harder to acknowledge or know exactly what you are feeling, but it's okay. It's okay to feel confused about what you feel, as long as you feel it. Allow yourself to experience the emotions, the sadness, the anger, even the joy that comes from sharing your favourite memory. Allowing yourself to experience your own emotions is by far one of the healthiest ways to cope with grief. Don't bottle it up!

As much as I am typing this for anyone out their struggling to cope with the loss of someone dear to them, I'm also writing this for me, as a reminder that it is okay to feel what I am feeling. It is okay not to bounce back within the first 2 weeks of their loss. However, it is not okay to bottle up your feelings. It is not okay to alienate the people who care for you, and who are trying to reach out to you. It is okay to feel vulnerable, it is okay to cry.

I feel as though I've unintentionally vented, which truly wasn't the purpose of this post, but honestly, I feel so much better having all these things written in front of me, as opposed to being locked up in my head. If anyone out there is coping with the loss of someone they loved dearly, please don't lock yourself away from experiencing your emotions, or from the people who love you and care for you.

I may take some time away from the blog, but I've yet to decide just how long. I will do some posting on my Instagram, some hauls, selfies, and pictures of my puppy and anything else that I enjoy, so feel free to follow @ladyjpsych on IG.

Until next time lovelies,
Bye.
(^_^)/

J's Thoughts #2: Self-Care (Coping with Stress)

Hello everyone!

Today, I'm slowing it down a little. I've just completed one of the most strenuous and exhausting weeks of my Masters', and I just need to take it easy. I can honestly say I've never felt this exhausted before. I'm used to being physically tired or physically drained, but feeling mentally depleted is kind of new to me, at least depletion to such a high degree.

I'm used to be tired and yawning constantly, but falling asleep on myself, and mentally blanking out in classes and conversation...that's very new.
To be honest, I'm struggling to write this post, because I can't concentrate on what I want to say or the point I want to get across, but I feel so exhausted, I just want to curl up in bed and not leave for another 2 days.

I figured that there may be many persons like myself who need some help with figuring out some good stress-coping (self-care) tips, so I'm just going to put a short-list of things I think are great for coping with stress, and that I'm actually going to be doing this weekend.

Self-Care (Stress-Coping) List

1. Sleep - Sleep is essential for proper mental, emotional and physical functioning.  
2. Exercise - I may not look it, but I love to workout, and exercise is one of the best ways to reduce the levels of cortisol (stress hormone) in the body. Whether it is yoga, running, swimming or dancing, whatever you like to do to get active, do it!
• P.S remember to remain hydrated
3. Spa Day - Whether you choose to do it at home or go to a spa, spending some time to pamper yourself, is a great way to deal with stress. I personally prefer at home spa days, where I treat myself to a face mask, and/or do my nails, it is just a great way to unwind. Also, add some scented candles and some instrumental music...hello relaxation haven!
4. Indulge in a hobby (Reading and Video Games)  - Hobbies are one of the best ways to reduce stress. It wouldn't be a hobby if you didn't enjoy doing it. Whatever your hobby is, set some time aside and just indulge yourself, it works wonders. Baking is one of my favourite hobbies, so I will be making some time to make some yummy baked goods this weekend.
• Reading - Yes, reading. Novels, comics, graphic novels, anything besides your textbooks or work notes or newspaper. Leisure reading is a great way to unwind.
• Video Games - Yes, video games! You didn't think I would forget about my beloved video games. Hearthstone, Sims 3, I'm coming back for this weekend...(T_T). Seriously, playing video games is one of my favourite ways to cope with stress, just being able to leave reality behind for a few hours, helps me. 
5. Music - Listening to music is always a great, and easy way to decompress and relax. If you love singing, sing your heart out!

*At this point, I've curled up at my desk about 10 in the past hour of writing this post*

As I end this post, I just really want to drive home the importance of de-stressing or relaxing, because it is essential. I know many of us would prefer to just keeping going, but no good comes from burning yourself out.  I am, myself learning how to relax. I'm so used to just pushing myself, that I forget to treat myself human sometimes...

I hope you all have a lovely weekend, take care of yourselves, and I hope to see you here again next Friday.
Bye guys!
(^_^)/

J's Thoughts #1- Chit Chatting about Feeling Down

Hello everyone,

I know for the past month, I've been throwing out product reviews and I even revived my Game Corner Series, which was mega fun for me, however, it's been a while since I just wrote about myself and how I've been doing, so I figured that today I would do that.
I had planned to do a skin care blog post to talk about some new products I've introduced to my routine, but I just have no drive to make that post today.

Today for the first time in approximately a month, I have no drive or excitement to post or write or even to play a video game. I told one of my friends earlier this week that I just feel so exhausted by everything, but today is definitely the worse day of them all. I posted some swatches on my Instagram today, only to delete it an hour later, simply because I didn't feel excited about my post. I'm usually really excited to post my swatches, or pictures of my dogs and random selfies, but today, I just feel meh.

You're probably wondering why I've decided to share this on my blog?

Well the answer is simple, I know I am not the only person who falls into these slums. Also, as a person who is planning on becoming a Psychologist, it's important for me to acknowledge these moods, and negative emotions, and find means to adapt or just simply relax and let them run their course.

I've spent so much of my life hiding behind a fake smile, try not to acknowledge my feelings, that only now I've come to realize, I'm not always going to be happy or optimistic, I'm going to have days, hell even weeks where I just feel run down, sad, and unenthusiastic.

I just need to remind myself, like I am reminding you, better days are coming. Even if it doesn't feel that way, hold on little one because they are. These feelings and moods won't last forever, and you just need to take baby steps to get your groove back.

I know this isn't in the usual nature of my blog, but this is not just my space for sharing my favourite games, makeup and beauty items, but it's also a place for me to place what's on my mind, it is my Mind Palace!

I'll return to my normal postings next week, but for now, I need to rest. I know this post is a bit of a downer but everyone experience lows in their life, I'm just choosing to share my with the world.
Until I see you lovely people again next week, stay safe.
Bye guys (^-^)

#DearMe

Dear Me,

You may not be a size 4 or size 6 but hell yes, you're beautiful! Don't let the cruel words from family or supposed friends bring you down. You're weight and size DO NOT define you as person, you heart does, and word is you have one purer that gold. 

Dear me, 

It's okay to geek out over comics and video games. Don't be ashamed of the things you love because they lead to you meeting some of the best people you could never have imagine existed. 

Dear me, 

Love yourself every moment of the day! Stop the self loathing. Treat yourself the way you treat the people you love: kindly, sweetly and sincerely. You deserve it! 

Dear me,

You are not worthless! You have a purpose, so keep fighting.

Dear me, 

Dieting and losing weight are not the keys to your happiness. Accepting yourself, loving yourself everyday are. Step away from the cleanses and the crash diets! They do more harm than good. 

Dear me, 

We're still single but you learn it isn't the end of the world. It's not that anything is wrong with you, it's because you know what you want and won't settle for anything less. Keep your head and your standards high!

Dear me, 

I love you, you're amazing and please don't ever forget that!

My Words #1

A poem I wrote in the spur of the moment one night. I was waiting for a burst of inspiration, and it finally hit me like a ton of bricks. I hope I'll enjoy more nights of inspiration like this. :)

Going to be posting more of my own poetry and writings on here.